How I re-met my Husband

A long time back, during one of my Phil vacations, mom came to me and she was with this 40sh-old woman who turned out to be a wife of a relative. Mom said held out your hand and let her read it. So what's this.. is she manghuhula or something? I'm not a superstitious person and not a fan of hula but my mom insisted. Wala naman daw mawawala. So okay I obliged. I held out my hand to her and then ask "so what do you see?" She said that I'm a happy person that all I want is happiness around me and all my goals were for my parents. We'll that's so true. But that is what everybody is like right? Anyhow, I continue. I then ask a funny question.. makakapag-asawa pa po ba ako? "Oo naman. yan oh. Kilala mo na nga kung sino." (she also said we'll have 3children together) right then and there I made a list of who could possibly the person be and I have few candidates in mind. A childhood crush, a friend, etc.. but really there is no way I could have ended up with any of these people.

I think I was on my slightly late-20s when I started to worry about life. Ever since I work abroad I have not been in a relationship. It is so different when you are in your home country rather than being overseas. Different in a sense that the chances to meet someone is limited. Sometimes I ask God that if ever, I prefer someone who is from my past. Meaning someone I know already. Could be a former classmate or workmate or a childhood playmate. Because just the thought of introducing yourself to a stranger and putting your best foot forward exhaust me already.

13March2013, I got a random fb message from someone.. "Hi save. Kamusta ka na?" It was Carlo. and you know if an opposite sex randomly sends you a message either you get creep out or you get intrigued. With him it was the latter. I thought huh buti ng-message ito? before hitting up the reply button I checked his profile first. There wasn't much actually. Mostly were tagged photos from his colleagues. He's wearing braces, clean-cut, fair-complexion, he looks neat. In one of his tagged photos amidst a group of wacky faces he remains the only one smiling. Ah di sya makasat. liked! looks mahiyain. liked! Doesn't post much. liked! He's employed. Checked! He's a person from my childhood. We were schoolmates. Batchmates. Same age. I know him. He knows me. We came from the same place literally from the same Brgy.! In short aba pwede! Pwedeng pwede!

From the very 1st message he sent, there was this instant kilig and for some unexplainable reason the kilig was overflowing! Suddenly fireworks and rainbows and butterflies in my stomach came pouring over me. Overflowing. I told myself that this is it. He is the one. I cannot explain it but it felt that way right away. Maybe because we are from the same place? and we were batchmates? I'm not sure. But what I clearly remember is that I have never felt for someone as strongly as what I have felt for him. I have never felt more secure for myself to someone and I was feeling this way already whilst not yet meeting him in person.

Coincidentally, two months after we first exchange messages I was set for my annual vacation. But it was not only me coming home it means judgment day for both of us. Are we going to click? Are we going to feel the same way when we finally see each other in person? So the day has come. It was the most nerve-wracking day of my life. The dogs started to bark signaling someone they aren't familiar with was out there. My heart was pounding so fast that I can almost hear it. My two young nieces (shey&ishen) didn't help much. They came out and came back running at me telling me "mommy save ang pogiiiiii! ang puti nya! lumabas ka na!" I came out of the house and opened the door and there I saw him standing under the rays of the sun holding a bouquet of white flowers smiling. 1st thought? yay ang gwapo! 🙈  I ask him to come in and when I saw him upclose I, out of nowhere blurted out "bakit ang gwapo mo?" hahaha I really wanted to play it cool but I guess it was too late. He spent the rest of the day at our house. Then the next day. Then the next.

One story he shared, when we were little, he saw me once at the H.E. of our Elementary School with my square short hair, with a headband and thought I look cute! (although I move to a different school, I still go to his school because that's where mom works. In fact, my mom was his grade1 and grade2 teacher). As he recalled, from then on he always looks forward seeing me in the school ground. So when his sis-in-law ask him, two decades later, if she can introduce him to someone, her name is save. I reckon his answer was Yes :) That's where the random "kamusta ka na" message came from.

I always say this to people who ask on how we met, that our love story is so simple. There was no drama. Its like God-given. It was like a gift that the Lord wrapped long time ago and was given to us because it was the right time. I think when we met we are in the perfect place and in the perfect time in our lives. Everyone approves. Everything felt right.

Soon After, December that same year. I find myself in the airport waiting for him to arrive. It was another nerve-wracking day for both of us. I know it was not only him that was coming but a future together. We are nervous but we are ready. When he arrived, we knew, another chapter of our lives have unfolded anew.

Our 1st ever picture together :)

Heart at First Sight!

01Jan2013, my two bestfriends and I decided to welcome the New Year in DFC to see the fireworks up close. The countdown begins with a hologram clock positioned above the water. This is in the waterfront ironically situated at the back side of DFC. When the clock hit 11:50 people started yelling. Everyone is hyped. Its almost time. 10 seconds until it reached down to 3, 2, 1 then boom! The dark luminous sky turned alive and colorful. We found the perfect spot. The fireworks were just right above us and almost suddenly the whole sky were covered with different colors and formations. It was so beautiful. Magical. Otherworldly. Ofcourse given the growing millennial in me I took pictures of it. A lot of it. When we got home and about to go to bed (yes still with the two. they are like my sisters and we were inseparable back then) I was scanning all the pictures but one shot captured my attention.

There's this one shot that accidentally formed a heart! Wow Ang galing. How rare can you capture an amazing thing such as this?! I mean wow! How extraordinary. Of course I post in on Instagram which was in public mode at the time.(still getting the hang of it)

For many years I stopped asking God for signs.. but for whatever reason, randomly I told God, if tomorrow morning when I wake up and there are 23likes on my post then it means something or someone special will come this year. I know! At 26 I never outgrew being sappy and mushy 🙈 and I choose 23 because.. well birthday.

So the morning came. The first thing I checked was my phone. Opened my IG and tadaaah!

Its 23! wait..what? really? Seriously? Of all numbers huh.. of all numbers.. well-played..Well-played.

Two months later, March2013, I got a random message from someone.. "Hi save kamusta ka na?" - Carlo

The day I found out I'm Preggo!

When we got married, both my husband and I decided not to bear a child just yet. Maybe after a year or two, when we are more settled with things. Lets enjoy first the Co. of each other, travel as a couple, find better jobs so we will be financially, emotionally and mentally ready. What I realized is nothing can ever prepare for the coming of a child.

Jan 07 2016, in the middle of our Philippine vacation, I was to attend a friend's bridal shower. She's also on vacation only for her wedding so I in no way can not possibly miss it. We were scheduled for a mountain adventure to Mt. Pinatubo that day where a Spa Resort situated somewhere up in the mountain is waiting to spoil us. It would be my first time to experience Mt. Pinatubo, I heard we will be doing a mud spa which I think is so cool! The other bridesmaids are my best friends too and they too came from other sides of the world.. Paris, Singapore, the bride herself is from US so it would be like a HS reunion for us. We have not seen each other for like 5-8yrs. So I was really excited. We all were. But for some reason, the very morning of that day, I had an "urge". Suddenly I wanted to take a pregnancy test. I counted if  I missed my period and as tense as I already was, I did missed and was actually delayed for like 4days already. I ask my husband to buy a pregnancy test right away. I don't think I'm pregnant (more like my mind wanted to think I'm not pregnant) but I wanted to make sure mainly because I'm about to go on a mountain trip that day and I don't ever want to risk! Talk about woman's instinct huh.

Took the test and wallah... Two stripes! I saw it unfold right in front of my eyes! From having the 1st stripe going to the 2nd blurry one until it became both very visibly. OMG! I'm pregnant! Shocked. Surprised. Tensed. I showed it to my husband who is waiting just outside the toilet. Carlo buntis ako. oh and the look on his face! He literally said "Yessssss!!" Cause this was the moment he's been waiting for. He was so happy!

I made a text message to my friend that I had an emergency. I cannot go anymore. I'm sorry. Have fun girls. I'm gonna miss you guys. Honestly, I was a bit upset for not being able to go with them but as upset as I may be, there is no way in my mind and in my heart I will risk my baby (at this moment the thought of having a baby was surreal) to any threat of miscarrying.

I was just blown-away by the fact that of all the days, she made me known of her existence the day I'm about to head up of what could be a rough thing to do for a pregnant woman. That "urge" is my little one telling me "Mommy.. I'm here. I'm holding on." Its like she really wanted to live and just the thought of that melted the whole of my being.

Thank you for a Goodbye

Infatuation or love? I know! how elementary (and corny) those terms were right? but really how can you differentiate the two.

Years ago, I was reunited with a friend of mine. Despite the distance and the years he remain one of the constants in my life. I have gone into college, work overseas, a decade and half have past and he was still there. Will pay me a visit to our house whenever I'm home. Will give an overseas call and chat for over an hour just to catch up. We had quite some fun adventures together like going to places and its always been a blast. He made sure his presence is felt whenever time and place permit. And I appreciate it. I wouldn't blame myself for being a bit hopeful though, that maybe one day, maybe, all this will lead into something. Because growing up I have the biggest crush on him. So big that I think he was my first love. Or so I thought.

The chances of friends seeing each other abroad and knowing distance isn't a hindrance anymore got me excited. So much to look forward to. So we met. In a span of two months there are good and horrible things that had happened and things that made me realize we are not meant for each other. It was not at all I thought I expected it to be, simply saying he is not the one for me. So I bid goodbye. and this time it was for good. But in the inside I was left wondering why would fate bring us together and make us fall apart too? I waited for him, for this moment, for this chance but why we fell apart? I just didn't get it. It didn't make sense to me.

After a month of nursing my heart,  I met Carlo, my husband. and it is when everything finally made sense to me.

I am a strong believer of fate and destiny. I strongly believe that everything happens for a reason and oftentimes, it is for a better reason. I realized that even if it shaken me up abit things had to happen because only then I was able to bid goodbye to this person without having any ounce of 'what ifs' and 'could haves'. It gave me a sense of closure I never thought I needed and timing couldn't be more perfect.

When I met my husband my heart is whole and ready. And the rest as they say is history.

has it been four years? wow!

Amused.. Amazed and very much, I guess, thankful is the right words I can best describe the last four years of my life.

I almost have forgotten that I have a blog and that oftentimes, I really want to put down on words my "thought of the moment" but that I do not have outlet except for the social media accounts then hello my blog. I'm quite happy to re-visit you again.

Wow! Just wow! After that last post of mine, boy how much have changed. Literally the following month was life-changing for me. New chapter and probably the moment I have always been waiting for finally came into existence. Yes, I'm now married to my soulmate and we have been blessed with a beautiful daughter whom we adore so much! I guess I can finally say that "Life is Good. I'm leaving a dream"

But before I continue, let me go back to the meaningful beginning of the Year 2013. Because a part of my life got a closure. "To pick your self up one must falter."Go to my next post.